This week is all about Venice Biennale.

If you are in Vienna enjoy it to the max and go to see that movie you wanted but never had the time.

If you are heading to Venice read further:

Two years ago Bpigs asked super talented Italian designer Andrea Nicolo for help.
Here is a list of casual inanities and vital survival questions for you to spout out, not in English, because –hello- anybody can do that. But in the original Botticelli language. Study on the plane from Hong Kong, or the U-bahn from Steglitz. If you also manage to throw in a fake British accent somewhere in there, you will have them by the Jeff Koons.

Is that a water taxi?
Questo e’ un taxi acquatico?

How do I get out of this island?
Come lascio questa isola?

I am an independent curator
Sono un curatore indipendente

I run a non profit space.
Gestisco uno spazio non-profit

I am not exhibiting, this year, no…
No, quest’anno non espongo

I work for Ai Wei Wei.
Lavoro per Ai Wei Wei

Could you please walk me to the hotel I keep walking in circles.
Puo’ portarmi in albergo? Continuo a girare a vuoto

How far is the beach from here?
La spiaggia e’ molto lontana?

This pizza tastes like rubber.
Questa pizza fa schifo

The Giardini was really disappointing this year, but I really enjoyed the Arsenale.
I giardini non erano granché, quest’anno. Ma l’Arsenale mi e’ piaciuto molto

An Aperol spritz please. And keep them coming.
Un Aperol spritz, per favore. E continui a portarne

Of course I remember…
Certo che mi ricordo…

Where is the Bauer hotel?
Dove si trova l’hotel Bauer?

The drinks are on the gentleman behind me/next to me
i drinks li paga lui

Could you hold my drink while I look for my business card.
Puoi tenermi il drink mentre cerco il mio biglietto da visita?

I own a start up.
Ho una start-up

I am press.
Sono Stampa

I am sorry I don’t know who you are.
Mi dispiace, non ho idea di chi tu sia

Could you get us in?
Ci fai entrare?

My name is not on the list but I am here with someone.
Il mio nome non sta sulla lista, ma sono qui con qualcuno

Younger than Jesus.
Sono piu’ giovane di Gesu’

original: http://bpigs.com/diaries/de-diary/venice-survival-guide-1